Synthetic vocal cord gel could give people their voices back


It aint over til the fat lady sings, a wiseman once said. That man may have to append that theory to “it aint over til the fat lady sings, rubs gel on her throat, then sings again.” That’s because scientists at Harvard and MIT are hard at work on a vocal cord gel that will be used to give stricken folks their voices back.

The synthetic gel, known as polyethylene glycol (PEG), is super flexible and actually acts a lot like real vocal cords. How does it work? Well, you have to, um, inject it, eek, into your damned vocal cords. Ok, that sounds like an unpleasant process but the results are very pleasant indeed. It restores the voice by mimicking the elasticity of vocal cords and helping restore vibration.

This is great news for those folks injured by scarring, burns or anything else that can affect our lovely, lovely vocal cords. Scientists note this process is still a long ways off but they hope to get it to the market relatively soon. No word on if and when it will become a party drug.