Everywhere you look, there are smartwatches as far as the eye can see. What about the humble smart belt, you may ask. Where is the smart belt? Nobody seems to care about making belts smart, even though they perform some very important tasks, like keeping our junk, and our girth, from showing. Plus, hey, with all of those loops and what not, it’s kind of the perfect accessory to hide some tech inside of. Thankfully, one design company had the same exact thought. Enter the, um, smart belt and watch combo thingamajig doodad whatever-er.
Designed by the team over at Suzi Roher, the Urban Tech Belt doesn’t actually have any tech embedded in the belt proper. Rather, it comes shipped with a smart watch that inexplicably hangs from one of the buckles. It offers similar functionality to most smartwatches, the ability to check text messages, calls and listen to music. However, it must be noted, this watch is not on your wrist. It dangles from your pants, thus making the entire convenient point of smartwatches null and void. Also, it is unseemly to go grabbing around your crotch area every time you want to read a text massage. That’s harassment, brother.
So, yeah, this is a pretty niche device. There is one more deal breaking thing. When this belt-cum-watch-or-whatever ships, it’ll cost $725. That is enough money to buy a handful of premium leather belts and a Moto 360 or Pebble Steel, with plenty of money left over for pizza slices or, gag, salads.